Spoilt
I've been feeling terribly spoilt these days. I think my parents are getting worried over me always staying late in school to study, since they've never seen me like that before. My mum's busy with her Get Drunk In China programme now, yet she takes the time to make soup almost daily, and I know it's for me. It's her way of saying she cares, and not to "stress out" (though that doesn't quite happen to me); the same way her non-stop rambling about her most recent projects is to involve me in her life. Though not always welcome, nor fascinating since she says the same things only about ten times over. Yet, I'm glad that she values my opinions enough to get me to have a look through her script and give comments, and this is what I enjoy most. I learnt a lot. The process of wine, the difference between Chinese white wine and yellow wine, and the difference in process between Western wine and Chinese wine. I even improved my vocabulary. Now I know, viscidity = glueyness. What a wonderfully uppity synonym. She took me out to Jack's Place the next day, in return for my looking through her script. A really lovely treat and a wonderful break from the monotonous and tasteless life I've been having recently.
My dad's been spoiling me too. Fetching me to and from school and slowly, the reprimands of "DON'T STUDY TOO HARD! LET LIFE GO ON!" fades into furrowed brows and concerned reminders of "don't study too hard ya girl..." More importantly, he's been cheering me up unknowingly and somehow, always just when I need it. The two days I felt so down and sick of studying, and just spent the entire day whining away and hiding in my silly childishness, he'd somehow just msg to say "girl want to take a break and go have dinner?" (except he likes to use the word 'dindin', embarrassingly) or "girl take a break and come to borders? I'll buy you dinner". Helps heaps that Borders Bistro is one of my favourite restuarants. Oh well, even though we didn't eat there in the end, (went off to some other refine place Crystal Jade Jiangnan Cuisine, which was mostly a disappointment) I really felt like the black clouds that threatened to thunder and storm suddenly just got wished away by a gentle, caring breeze.
I've been spoilt by my friends too. Horribly. X-x who's always there to cajole me when I fall into one of my black moods and i-wanna-be-a-kid-let-me-alone times. And not once, does she ever flash me a look of irritation, not even when I spoil her entire day of studying, 'cause I'm just so good at disturbing people.
Then there's the other friend D- who constantly tells me to study, and even seems to worry more about my grades than I do. "I'm more worried for you than my delinquent cousin la" He too, never seems to mind, even when I leech off him in the last few hours of the night, or rather, early morning before the paper. When I decide to go out to study, he readily agrees to come along as well, even though he just spent the entire day studying in school.
There's the silent, mysterious one too. Someone whom I used to nag a little, but now has taken to actually telling me to study hard quite frequently, even checking up what I've studied and not. And the rides home are much much much appreciated. Even though they're on the way, I feel so bad depending on others, but he honestly doesn't seem to mind. I'd like to get to know him better, because I like his honesty and he seems to have a depth of character quite uncommon in people our age. Yet, it's hard, and I don't really know how far to push, because he is always so private and ... closed.
There's another, the friend who somehow came about despite not being in school 50% of the time in these two years? Started off with me just helping him collect notes whilst he was overseas and I'm glad I did. He may not attain the academic heights characteristic of 80% of the students in our school; but he has a certain maturity and solidness in character. Someone you know will be there if you ever need him. He offered to buy me something, and then told me to study harder in return for that. I didn't take it up, but I felt so appreciated in that moment when I found out it wasn't a joke. But as I told him, I help because I want to. And for a simple, heartfelt "Thank you."
I feel lucky; scrap that, I feel BLESSED. Especially today when my dad fetched me home, and practically pledged and declared that he'd do whatever to see me through my university education. I better work my bloody ass off for whatever remaining papers I have. Today was a day I felt really good studying. It's late I know, but really, better late than never. Because I was really afraid never would come first... Just a week and a half more. That's all. I feel sad actually. I'm not quite ready to close this chapter.
Give me strength please. And stamina.
My dad's been spoiling me too. Fetching me to and from school and slowly, the reprimands of "DON'T STUDY TOO HARD! LET LIFE GO ON!" fades into furrowed brows and concerned reminders of "don't study too hard ya girl..." More importantly, he's been cheering me up unknowingly and somehow, always just when I need it. The two days I felt so down and sick of studying, and just spent the entire day whining away and hiding in my silly childishness, he'd somehow just msg to say "girl want to take a break and go have dinner?" (except he likes to use the word 'dindin', embarrassingly) or "girl take a break and come to borders? I'll buy you dinner". Helps heaps that Borders Bistro is one of my favourite restuarants. Oh well, even though we didn't eat there in the end, (went off to some other refine place Crystal Jade Jiangnan Cuisine, which was mostly a disappointment) I really felt like the black clouds that threatened to thunder and storm suddenly just got wished away by a gentle, caring breeze.
I've been spoilt by my friends too. Horribly. X-x who's always there to cajole me when I fall into one of my black moods and i-wanna-be-a-kid-let-me-alone times. And not once, does she ever flash me a look of irritation, not even when I spoil her entire day of studying, 'cause I'm just so good at disturbing people.
Then there's the other friend D- who constantly tells me to study, and even seems to worry more about my grades than I do. "I'm more worried for you than my delinquent cousin la" He too, never seems to mind, even when I leech off him in the last few hours of the night, or rather, early morning before the paper. When I decide to go out to study, he readily agrees to come along as well, even though he just spent the entire day studying in school.
There's the silent, mysterious one too. Someone whom I used to nag a little, but now has taken to actually telling me to study hard quite frequently, even checking up what I've studied and not. And the rides home are much much much appreciated. Even though they're on the way, I feel so bad depending on others, but he honestly doesn't seem to mind. I'd like to get to know him better, because I like his honesty and he seems to have a depth of character quite uncommon in people our age. Yet, it's hard, and I don't really know how far to push, because he is always so private and ... closed.
There's another, the friend who somehow came about despite not being in school 50% of the time in these two years? Started off with me just helping him collect notes whilst he was overseas and I'm glad I did. He may not attain the academic heights characteristic of 80% of the students in our school; but he has a certain maturity and solidness in character. Someone you know will be there if you ever need him. He offered to buy me something, and then told me to study harder in return for that. I didn't take it up, but I felt so appreciated in that moment when I found out it wasn't a joke. But as I told him, I help because I want to. And for a simple, heartfelt "Thank you."
I feel lucky; scrap that, I feel BLESSED. Especially today when my dad fetched me home, and practically pledged and declared that he'd do whatever to see me through my university education. I better work my bloody ass off for whatever remaining papers I have. Today was a day I felt really good studying. It's late I know, but really, better late than never. Because I was really afraid never would come first... Just a week and a half more. That's all. I feel sad actually. I'm not quite ready to close this chapter.
Give me strength please. And stamina.
~ st*rcr*ss*d ~
posted by fallen star at 10:37 PM
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