blahhh. everyone around me is depressed. im worried for mar, scared for zul but i dunno wat the hell to do. i just want to reach thru and hug them. i think im a really physical person. blah. i hope they all take care of themselves. -scared-

i think im getting addicted to aaron. hes like.. how nice when hes nice. only talked for like 2-3 days and like wow.. hes so different. for once he doesnt start calling me names.. not the bad ones at least =P and like he so good at sweet talk. the other time i mentioned aarons change to jtwk and he struck a nail on the head when he asked if im scared i'll fall for him. =/ but he just makes me feel so great. rofl. but im scared. cuz like. hes where in the world? and like i dunno wats he like irl and he doesnt kno wat im like irl. guys said they'll wait for me i just snorted at them knowing its not true and they go and prove me right. the other day i wuz so touched cuz aaron stayed up just to try and see me. until 7.30. but i think now hes gonna change his attitude twds me cuz i told him i only like him as a fren. he didnt get all the hidden msgs that i didnt dare say outright to him whilst discussing some really sensitive topics that i took alot of guts to talk abt. sigh. but i dunno whether i like him or if its just that im so desperate for someone just to be there for me and call my own or that flattery is really getting to me. i just kno i wanna talk to him again. he sounded so.. sad and disappointed after my answer that night. and that night i cldnt sleep all that well. which is amazing for someone like me who just plonks right on the bed and sleeps. everytime i almost fell asleep i'd suddenly think of the convo and feel... bad.. and some other feeling. haish. dunno la.

stupid. arman, chastain and chubb got binklys eq and everything. dm. titan tattoo. ultra runes. sigils. mitrill stuff. and they're not returning. assholes. im sorry. i just thot theyd have more integrity than this. i'd thot that they wouldnt be seduced by the powerful stuff they got their hands on to. blah. im so bitter and cynical now. all cuz i think these ppl are bsing me abt their reasons for keeping the stuff. probably cuz they cant get it in a thousand years. all the effort wasted. if it wuz me. i'll go on another killing spree dammit. fking bitch fiona. all her fking fault. she cldnt keep her damn mouth shut. fking. whyd she come back and play. and like the coward she is she didnt come out after. fkbitch. and when arman told me wateva shit he told me i tried so fking hard to stay polite and nice and not snicker in his face. pigasses. grrr. fk. need to calm down. getting worked up over a fking game. stupid issy. so biased. now i totally dunno which imm to bliv in...

mrs wong told me today that if i go for trng 3 times a week regularly from now til july i can throw 30m. and im taking her up on her word. blah. i really want to throw at least 25. haha. but u kno how ure scared to aim high cuz if u fall wayyy off ur target u feel damn bad. hhaah... coward. me. coward. me. sigh. sometimes the world just seems gray.





'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

hiiiii. the net is bonkers again. it only likes my brother. haha. anw yesterday i had the gep thing =/ its like gep branch rocks la. want to celebrate 20th anniversary by making us suffer. bleh. hse prac in the morning. went late for once and didnt feel guilty cuz my stuff over liao! nyahahha. and then exco wuz being silly and hyper and doing mass dance. played dog n bone with the 16by 50 ppl. n then i decided to run off to meet faith and go watch busking instead of going for one hour of trng... i think im going to die next week. bleh. hope i rmb to get my excuse letters from ms ong.

faith and i went to taka to see buskers. ny had like all the acoustics and wat not. angeline wuz singing. just a bit too high i think. and then there wuz the dance which wuz really kinda cool. all of them were so... into it but sad to say some of them really cant dance. =/ okay i mean two. eleanor has a good bod man. =/ looks so toned somehow. then me and faith collected tins around 11.15. then this guy came up to me and went hi u rmb me? im from rosyth. ure from rosyth too right.and i wuz kinda too shocked to say anything. then i wuz like uhh. then he went on to say his name etc then im like ohh uhh yeahh i kinda rmb ur face.. hehe.. and then he wuz like oh nvm good luck with ur flag day and bye. =/ wahhaahha i felt how baddddd. wahha then i saw who ah. hmm nick, zul, andrew, hazmi, kenny, jonathan, joshua and thats abt it i think. wahhaha joshua super hdwking can. either that or hes not very smart. he stand at the traffic light and do. then we passed him a few times and hes still doing =/ and like u shldnt do it there cuz no one will donate there. poor guy =/

anw then faith bought a frappucina caramel or smth and i tried it.. its so nice. i just hate the coffee aftertaste. but the caramel and whipped cream.. mmmMmm.. then we kinda went shopping for a skirt for a while. and at selfridge faith picked out two skirts and then a blue icky v neck top. then i tried it on and i wuz like omg faith im not coming out. so she just whipped the curtain open and looked! i almost screamed and ran out in wateva crap i wuz wearing. and i wuz covering my front which faith said didnt cover much =/ craps wahaha and she wuz trying to console me by saying i looked good. omg. how scary. that freaked the hell outta me. rofl. i feel as tho theres this awkward cool atmosphere when i see tsai and cihan. tsai more like. i dunno la. mbbe its just me being anti again. i dunno wat to say to her now. and she didnt reply if she wanted to go shakespeare. guess its a no. no one seems interested leh. and im not going alone... its so boring.

anw i cant be bothered to blog so much abt yesterday liao. oh we learned kinematics as an application of integration and diffn at tuition. its way cool once u understand it. like wow. i need to find more songs to learn to play on the guitar. my repertoire so small and its like i can only do it when i have the tabs cuz i neva bothered to rmb. no need for it mah. and im so happy cuz heats are ALL over! i wuz so worried on friday that it wld rain cuz it wuz threatening to! and then i wuz worried i'd do badly which i did.. but oh well.. in the end i still did not that bad. in the sense that if i throw this dist i will qualify. except this sector wuz kinda big. not kinda. very. 18.96 i think. oh and i got to kno rachel. shes so cute. haha as in like she learns really fast and she has power. she would be like in the ring. wheres jw? wheres jw?? then she'll be like correct not? n everytime she turn around she'll look at me questioningly . and i'll nod my headd and she bam. wahaha not bad for a girl who wanted to throw more than 5 metres =/ which is kinda impossible for someone like her. 15.73 and she got fifth k. i think zx has betta potential in discus than in javelin mbbe. hmm. dunno la. shes good at both but she just... dun really seem to put in her all. anw toonys back aching again. sigh. i feel so bad for her leh. her backs always dying one.

okay i dun feel like blogging liao. bye.
'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

haha yay! sports heats almost over. havnt blogged in some time. come home so tired liao. anw today had 4 x1 kinda terrible cuz shiyun wuz sick, parsley didnt come down, one reserve sick one mia. so in the end pulled in katho and ruth.. haha i feel so sad and guilty cuz katho had 1.5km just right before and ruth had an injured ankle. kahei had to run for her. and kahei wuz feeling horrid after the 400m. darn i felt so guilty. cuz i kno i shld have taken her place. damn. sigh.

anw i love elfwood. it totally rocks. esp the ppl on there. i found this tania henderson or smth who paints and her ppl are like wow. and her mermaids Wow. and her water bkgds and rocks, WOW! -faints- i think my drawing improved a lil bitty. they just seem to have at least a slight expression now. instead of those usual stone faces. i wish i didnt give my drawing of ginas back to her. cuz haha i bet she threw it away. thats the picture that triggered off everything. i rmb i loved to draw when i wuz young but it just faded some how cuz i didnt kno how to do it step by step and improve. then that boring day in hist class i suddenly got fascinated by ginas back, posture cheekbones and hair.. so drew.. haha now.. i think im improving.. hope so anw.. heh.

learning tennis for pe now. its super hard i realised. cuz duh i'd try to use my forearm/wrist. haha but i cant wait to serve! im just like raring to go! woot. i only dread floorball. cant wait for napfa to be over. i think i super cannot run liao. so slow man... sigh rofl. zuls always so sad.. =/ heartbroken. sigh. i wish the two of them gets together... blah. still got bao zhang bao dao to do and i wanted to start just now but guess wat.. i have NO gao zhi. cuz i left it under my table and gave mine to evelyn... =/ how smart right. my thighs are so flabby now. haha at least MORE flabby than last time. yuck. and i saw jocelyn today. if thats how u spell it. she used to be this tiny girl from 604 my pri school. and she wuz with this super cute guy! the cleancut specs kinda look. i like. haha and shes super tall now. skiiiinny. got contacts. big eyes.. mmmm. sigh.. rofl everyone grows taller and i grow fatter. hehe. u kno wat? wenyi is my height. but shes 10kg lighter. and she wants to be lighter still! how scary. =/ wats so great abt being underweight? seriously. u could be stick thin. but u could have all that cholesterol stuck in ur veins and eventually clog ur vessels up and kill u.. haha. oh well.

i think chem remedials really bearing fruit. i feel even more interested now. and actually dun panic when i do mole questions anymore! HURRAY! -huggles ms tay- thanks ms tay! ure the best. shes the kind of teacher who seems to understand us best. as in like dun overest us. hehe. and she doesnt get angry. and she explains things in such a way u actually see a link and watnot. so u suddenly go.. wow! i neva knew that it wuz like that?!?! i gotta work on my qa. but i think its best when u forget things and relearn them. cuz one, not only will u rmb them betta somehow, but two, u can kill all those ugly and wrong misconceptions that pull u down and spoils ur morale!

hmm speaking of which.. somehow that reminded me of.. track. im still not done with attendance.. =/ crap zan doesnt have nov/dec and i cant find mine. i really really dun rmb huijuen passing me anything. but she probly did. sigh.... :'( anw well i betta submit it soon. and this week i keep missing trng. cuz of heats. and sat im gonna try and go down but i probly have to rush off again wahahaah.. so stupid. dammit. still got track camp proposal. hmm and the rules. i think i betta go do them now. i always push things aside once i got no more mood to do them and forget abt them. cleanly. lol.

as for waddle... i think when my year and the year after mine leaves, waddle might actually hv a shot at winning sports day. look at it this way. we've got sprinters. chloe, chew min, etc. long dist. katrina gan, quek xin er and geraldine ong i think. hrmm. and then we'll probly win swim carn too. we've got 49 swimmers and richardson has 50. but richard has like bern and lisa so they sure win this year. this year got second! whee.. haha. i kno ms ong very proud of those swimmers. katrina gan, emily, seet teng, amelene. haha... coolio ya. okay off to do hmwk and track stuff! eep i betta rmb to call janelle. =/

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

i feel so drained and peeved now. like just at times i feel like bursting into tears. dun even kno why. chanced upon zuls blog the other day. gosh read til want to cry. its so ... raw.. i hope whoeva hurt him learns to appreciate him and i hope hes smart enough not to do anything silly. my brothers so fking irritating.. keeps bugging me to let him use the comp... n like now i have to provide lunch dinner breakfast and clean and wash and wake them up early. stupid shit. and like all the food in the fridge is rotting cuz i've no fking idea how to cook them. and some asshole of a neighbour keeps smoking his fking cigarette so the smoke wafts into my hse and i happen to be a misocapnist? damn. trng yest wuz damn bad. i just felt dead before i started so then we had spec med ball throws and then sprint test again then circuit 3 rounds of double rounds. sprint test sucked. supposed to beat last years timing. rofl.. and i slowed down alot as expected. blah. anw then the circuit first round i died liao. until 3 round i started feeling not so giddy and faint and then my coach asks if im okay.. weird =/ i wanted to go watch the shakespeare thing but i realise i have no time and no body to go with. sigh. only asked evelyn but she said she wuznt interested... dunno who else to ask. wanted to go for the studyinaust exhibition today but yet again being the coward i am i dun dare go without my dad. whos working. and my mums in china. whee. n everythings peachy. just peachy. only that i have to mass call ppl and guess wat? i dun have their fking numbers. yay. my brothers down there groaning and moaning away... making all those disgruntled noises and i dun like yaku and kia and aaron gave up on me after one day. and he still dared say he likes me? rofl i knew it. he loves mel. he just got a shock when she got another bf. pfft.. i think hes made for her.. esp since he can put up with her.. or mbbe he doesnt kno wat shes really like.. lol. im sick of late nights. they're draining me. but i feel so desperate im like trying to find something.. online offline whereva.. but i cant find it. so i stay on the comp til wee hours and just spend my life with words.. i think my guitars improving a wee bit. its so fun now to play. esp when u have all those right chords to play heh. my best fren -the guitar. rofl coolio. and i still got house stuff to do. yay. so fun! -gasp- tsxh suggested a cheer up outing when i talked to her the other day... cuz i went like wateva in her 'face' rofl and i apologised after that cuz i felt so bad. im so grumpy now.. and no im not pmsing. i wish i cld go away and live life the way i want. but then doesnt everybody want that? and nothing eva turns out the way u think it will. sigh. still got track attndance to settle. blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. grrrr. i hate the hse. its so hot. freaking hot. i love my mini hifi. its the only thing that keeps me sane besides the guitar. thanks pa. and i neva end up blogging abt stuff i planned to blog abt lol.

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

blah.. feeling so raw now.. i just got mad with some guy on dl. khilendel... i dun even kno why. hes one of those ppl like aaron whos tone just pisses me off... blah.. how... wats wrong with me.. too stressed or wat? rofl WHAT stress.. im not even studying. not doing my hmwk. stupid postitlite doesnt want to work. blah blah blah. and no level coord has sent me any numbers or anything.. trying to learn dust in the wind now.. its so hard to rmb. grr. why cant it be some easy pattern blah. sigh.

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

You are going to marry Ashton Kutcher. He is kind
and sweet, but pulls a lot of pranks (and
probably quite a few on you too!!)and can
always make you laugh.
Congrats!!


Which male celebrity are you going to marry? (now 12 (i just added more, and still more to come!)results that have pics!)
brought to you by Quizilla

heh got those from txhs blog. i think im weird n possessive. i feel like sad and left out and disappointed or smth wheneva i find out that my frens go out with someone else and have a great time. u kno wat i realised my names neva mentioned on her blog. well mbbe not neva. but not saying that she had a great time and da da da. probably why im distancing myself from ppl now. i feel even more left out than eva when i go train. its like.. they all go out for lunch and since its zx who calls for it, the others try to be sensitive and not ask me along as well.. yeahh and then they dun even talk to me.. sigh... i didnt even ask to be that goddamn post. wth. so i just smile bravely and all and walk on ahead alone. yay. but mingmeis really sweet abt it and all.. shes always telling me im nice and wat not. heh and joanne too.. but oh well.. im scared of mingmei cuz she always calls me cute =/ scary.

Get to know the REAL you by crash_and_burn
Your Name
You Are A:	Goth
Your Favorite Band/Song	Evanescence - My Immortal
You Like To Read:	Romance novels
You Firmly Believe In:	Nose-picking
Everyone Thinks You Are:	A respectable person
You Were Conceived:	In the mall
You Will Marry:	A respectable person
Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

ROFL NOSE PICKING?! in a MALL?! REspectable GUY?! eww.. rofL! next one...

Your future occupation by meteoric
Your name
Your future occupation	Manager
Yearly income	$90,023
Hours per week you work	8
Education	Very little
Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

and...

Your future occupation by meteoric
Your name
Your future occupation	Computer salesman
Yearly income	$655,944
Hours per week you work	64
Education	High school dropout
Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

hmm see the diff with and without surname? rofl cute tho.. i make lotsa money for someone who does lil work or drops outta high school =P and next up!

Whats does your personality rate from 1-10? by morning_prayer
Your first full name
Your personality rates a	ten!
your best quality is	youre loyal
your worst quality is	ha nothing! you rule!
this is because	Of the people you hang around
Created with quill18's MemeGen 3.0!

lol woot! full marks rofl.. wat bs.. =/ im so nt man. sigh. feeling sorry for myself as usual. i got stuck with calling all helpers and all participants up. actually i offered. cuz one katho doesnt seem to be offering. two. i dun want anything to go wrong. wateva. pissed pissed pissed. sigh sigh sigh sigh. katho doesnt seem so perfect anymore heh. i think im going nt again. yay! nt time of the year! WOOT! wat shall i eat for dinner tonight.. hmm.. going to watch badminton.. yawns. sleepy. byeeeee

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

hiiiii. so bored. i stayed up the whole night rofl. cuz like i slept the whole day. sent mum off to china... and slacked the day away playing dl etc. now dunno wat to get for dinner cuz like the cupboards are bare! wheee.. rofl
grr irritating brother cant even let me mine for eg. asssss. last time they can use like how darn long when i didnt even touch the comp lorh. pigs. ASSHOLE!. hrm. im so petty

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

hiee... i had wanted to post alot of stuff. but its 524am and im lazy and i wanna read the book which i thot wuz boring but turned out to be interesting! anw i think im getting betta on dl.. hopefully less of a noob now. nice to have good frens. and i finally know how to get crowned.. thanks to that lovely person i helped earlier on... anw i cant wait for it! whee... betta redo all my eq first i think.. hrmm byeee =)

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

oh yea so reluctant to sleep man i. wuz supposed to go snow city with tsai. but as usual didnt materialise. i've learnt not to hope too much from these kinda stuff so i didnt feel bad this time and i didnt wait how many hours for just her reply that shes going her aunts hse to play mahjong. snort. im shying away from ppl again. i just dun wanna say anything. and im sneering at lotsa stuff now, albeit inwardly. like eunice. i dunno why. i dun really like her that much. its just.. shes kinda weird.. like talks abt herself.. but when u like ask her to do smth like teach u guitar she just stares at u in this funny manner. like wth u wanna learn for. sigh. and like last time i wuz out with her. i listened as usual. heh. i dunno. blah. im so disgruntled why why why.. sigh.. whyyyyyyyyyyyy... nothing i do is like happy anymore. heh at least i dun spend money hopefully. must save. save. save. in a saving mood right now. i think i can forget abt my jacks place lunch. im drifting like a long in the endless turbulent oceans, tossed and battered, bruised, hurt, yet reluctant to splinter into tiny pieces. clinging on to all my wood fibres yet being drained slowly of substance, mentally, physically, emotionally. wow getting poetic. mad liao. im not going to ask anyone out. not unless i really have to. it doesnt pay to have high hopes and then feel rejected. and i hate myself everytime i feel disappointed cuz of such stuff. plus going out uses money. no way. most times im happy to get a day to rest anw. sigh need to regroup myself. use glustick to stick my falling self back into one whole piece. sigh. sigh. shld i go sleep? =/ think i shall get a cuppa ice water.... sigh...... shld start doing history. nods.. water made me feel betta. slightly. more awake too. talk later.

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

blah feel like eating sherbet now. =/ sigh. yoggi. sniff.
'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

been a few days since i've done this. feeling very subdued now. so decided needed to blog. sleepy and quiet.. u kno that kinda mood where u dun wanna talk to anyone at all. bleh. lets see.. swim carn on friday wuz horrid. taking attendance such a headache. probly also cuz i mined eg til like 5am that morning =P but then oh well... i really cant wait for sports fest to be over. i dun have time to slack or just take a breather. after sports fest is caltex then Os then mocks then nats then Os =/ and i still havnt decided if im going jc. probably. but which jc? still dunno.. sigh.. i stilll have this great reluctance to go jc.. >.< i think im just lazy. dun wanna live this kinda life anymore. no life at all man.

anw we got 3 dms liao so far. 2 came to me. one to roti. next one will be his again. i wanna mine down once all by myself.. but i bet it'll take ages. moms leaving tmr night. and like today she had some problems with the camera crew from china. they're so smart. day before departure, start complaining that they dun wanna wake up so early to film.. and all the times visitng the companies have been set liao lorh. and they cant be fired cuz its like tmr going liao. oh well. hols pretty slack i think but its gonna zoom by. i hope i get the inspiration to clean my room. or at least organise my sec 3 and 4 stuff. and learn chinese. chinese lessons are useless.. i dun learn a goddamn thing. such a freaking waste of my time. and she wanted to have TWO chinese remedials a week. blah. but now she decided on one. friday. there goes my free day. only mon left now. unless chem occasionally takes it up. chem is good. i feel good during chem remedial learn stuff ya. n ms tays a marvellous teacher. hope i dun disappoint her n myself this year.

i finally changed my earrings today. no one said it wuz nice. i think only i think so. its the rect with star one. heh. and i went to this fashion to shop just now. chanced upon it in dhoby ghaut and went in to take a look. stupid pouring rain. theres this pants i like alot. still cant find a skirt. sigh. lousy cuts.. my butt so big. bleh. sigh. im kinda sleepy shld i go sleep or mine eq again? i dunno... =/ i shld start studying.. yeah i think i shall.. but i need more strength. friday slept at 7+ and woke up at 2am. oh and today so sad k. had house prac but no trng. waste my time. and i realised i've spent 250 hours for house prac... useless thing. waste of time. sigh. sigh sigh sigh. ugh. sigh. i think im getting pms. and im such a loner nowadays. i dun talk to anyone. unless complaining abt chinese lesson. and mrs mo. bleh. im scared for my geog. up til now i have no idea how to write a mature answer that shows thought blah. ccrap shit. i got 10/10 for the recent test tho. surprising but she said my answers lacked thot/maturity. i shld start swimming. sigh.. why cant there be a one person racket sport.. mbbe i'll take up squash. i realised theres a squash and tennis ctr at yio chu kang. mbbe i can go there. i think i need a break to like catch my breath, and get back my energy. im like just moving thru stuff like zombie. too draining. now i got attendance to worry abt. sigh. =/. sigh sigh sigh. one after another. im just glad not all at one go. and i still got track camp proposal. darns. ugh. sigh. i wish my brother wuz here. hes at grandpas house cuz hes going dunman on mon or smth. cool huh. heh. i think i shld start planning out my days... at least i'll feel accomplished but i'll probly just not follow as usual. sleepy. tmr has the studyinaust exhibition shld i go?
sigh.
i dunno.
dunno.
and i think im losing my appetitite. actually mbbe not. probly gaining. in school eat two meals. big ones. like 2 bowls of mee. then come home eat one scoop of rice only. etc. oh and i managed to save 20 bucks this week. just didnt feel like spending plus my bill wuz 70 bucks. need to save. sleepy. sigh. think i shall go. night.

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

its like 3.20am. and my dads laboring hard behind me, lifting free weights. he doesnt really sleep much or smth? anw i finally finished my hist stuff. took so long cuz of dl. there wuz this oh so fat mobile with 9 mill hp and we killed him! whee... lotsa nice spam... muahaha anw then got 6 emeralite. coolio.night!

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

I love my brother. I love the popcorn. My brother gave me the popcorn. Made me feel so much betta all of a sudden.. thanks bro... he just did it outta the blue. he just thrust it in my face the usual brotherly way and went 'want to try?' and i did... and i havnt stopped... its like... 'happy' food or smth... thanks bro again =) -huggles-

i feel so lost now.. seriously dunno wat to do... the waddle entry list i sent out to ms ong is different from the one in the diskette and we risked our hides to get it -shudders- kt wuz like frightening =/ oh well i felt so silly when i finally decided wat to do. i'll just follow the diskette one la.. its not that big a deal right. i hope i rmb to print out the helpers list. =/

okay and then had training today.. so achy k. probly cuz last week neva train at all. then mr halsall finally asked for attndance when i wuz going to ask him. and he plays marvellous guitar... =/ sigh.. i really feel like stepping down today. theres such a mean streak in ppl sometimes.. but u dun even recognise it til u see it in someone else... bleh

anw i'll blog more later i hope. now that waddles settled i can go do my hist, revise hist with kc and his bio too...

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

Wahahahah this morning i wuz served with my amusement of the day and possibly the whole week! rofl. Kim whipped out a bottle of a disgusting green pills. Its like that kinda umm vivid dark green kind. =/ i've neva eva saw any pills, tablets or candies of THAT colour. rofl absolutely horrifying. and she bullied me into taking one, with much reluctance from me. It looked absolutely disgusting. rofl. and so i ate one. she said it taste pretty okay so i put it in my mouth cuz she threatened to tickle me. and then i placed it under my tongue and pretended to bite and chew it. wahahah then it started melting or smth. had this funny sweet taste. so i whipped out my bottle and swallowed the pill with the water i drank tho kim warned me that it'll taste worse that way. GUESS wat those pills were??! HORNY PILLS! and the desc went something like this: Feeling really horny? Can't think of anything else but sex? Can't control those raging hormones? Take Horny Pills!

=/ O.o =S >.<

i totally didnt kno wat to do man.. my face was like contorted with warring expressions rofl. so funny! and u kno wat shes been taking quite a bit of them recently or she said so and she said she likes the taste and she said they work. =/ shes kinda open abt her feelings one hehe. i rmb the other time she said she didnt like romance novels cuz they were too arousing. not many ppl would have said that straight in ur face heh. this topic reminded me of the gossip abt who she likes. i wonder if she still likes him. and i hope if they like each other, that all will turn out well... =)

and guess wat?!? i slept at 4 yesterday. all cuz of lingolas. he mined down to eg see.. so i suddenly had this humongous urge to do so too!! and justin agreed to stay up with me! how nice is he man. considering he has trng some more. haha. and we really did it! we just mined to 1070 and there eg wuz... muahahaha. but nice binkly didnt tell me that eg had horrid breaths. i just got blown away like a piece of feather. so lousy. and guess wat? roti saves the day again! woot! and oh yeah we had aferi to help us and guess who got him in? roti! cuz he promised aferi an abp. then so aferi wuz supposed to do 5 rooms but he just went all the way and even helped us fight and hold against eg with his elemental =) then i just uplifted them and res'd them. then there wuz this cute lil guy called shakan who helped mine too! he just came in said hi and just started mining like that. haha how helpful. and all he wanted wuz the craft skills or smth according to him. ling helped a lil before he went off for his crabs. cuz he wanted to mine eg but i asked him not to cuz i wuz doing so. then he said he'll help me provided he can get the rare gems.. why not.. heh after i cant get them out. i think hes getting another gem miner. i need to make money. money can do alot of things... lol and anw after the whole thing, moshi gave aferi 2 dscs! how nice is he man... and the dm came to me still.. even tho i didnt do anything at all >.< felt so bad. wahahha so now im mining down thru the copper layers so moshi can get rune pillar. haha.
oh ya another thing. did a quest from radyn the other day. so cute! i got a tattoo equivalent of sdt! how cool is that. i asked this guy for the stats and they were really the same! muahaha plus she mitrillised it for me too! whaahhahaa. i feel so braggy cuz right that guy whom i asked for stats (cant rmb his name, started with a D) he told me he bought it for TWO MILLION BUCKS! cuz it wuz the last unbinded one.. muahahah and i think mine doesnt bind =P wahahaha.. and it wuz so easy. quest went something like this: Find radyns voucher buried in the bowels of tarsonis. first place that came to my mind wuz sewers but i wuznt sure if they were part of tarsonis. so after a while, i got too curious, stopped mining and astralled in. and typed where. it just said The Sewers. but i still scanned around a while. cuz i had this huge hunch. but i decided not correct after all. so i went back to mining. i have good timing. looked at the screen when radyn sent me a tell. asking if i gave up already? then she said i wuz close! so i told her my whole long story rofl. then asked if i could cont or wld it be considered cheating. but she said go ahead. so then yeah i think i killed off all my astral points, so went to n w e gates to find entrance gave up went to tsq to sigh then she pointed south. how nice the only gate that i didnt look at wuz the one i wanted! so search search search. kiasyn wuz there too.. hmm mbbe radyn told her? dunno... cuz when i first went there, she wuznt there.. mbbe kiasyns smart. after all she got crowned and i didnt. sniff. then find find find got lost. tsq again. then try again and wuz at the same rooms as kiasyn cuz we both went down together.. scan scan scan wuz abt to give up but decided to scan some more and guess wat! found it!!! -squeals- rofl and i didnt think the prize would be soooo cool! muahahaha. anw im gonna go now. my brother wants to use again. pshhh and i need to go read hist anw and do my eng compre.. byeeee

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

I look like a doll.

That wuz the first darn thing i thot whilst i squinted at my haircut, trying to figure out if im amused or dismayed =/ rofl i thot the haircut wuz going pretty fine until he started with my fringe. =/ cut. then cut. then cut. and cut and cut and cut.. whahahaha so short now.. i guess i shld have asked for like slanted kind or something. so dolly. rofl anw that guy took so long to cut my hair can. and cuz he combed my hair down the front, my nose wuz itching madly rofl. heh and i think pas haircut wuznt that great. wahahah my brother just came back and said ur hair sucks its the worst i've eva seen. oh dear. and i think i look like that girl from crescents in my tuition class.. whahahaha so sad.. i hope my hair will grow faster. mbbe i shld like wear a cap to school or something. lol

and i finally got my gem mining past 91%! haha so happy. in fact it jumped to 93++ liao. thanks to justin also. stayed up pretty late last night. and like had a nice chat with him. we seldom talk liao. esp eva since he started going out with mel. like immediately got this huge gap. heh i dunno la. i guess its like that unless u kno the girl hes going out with very well.

oh yeah and i finally revised some of my html. which is still so basic. but at least i managed to change my bkgd color and font color. anyhow pick the font color one. typed umm 444555 rofl. cute right. im still trying to make the font smaller. its kinda big. hmm but i like my font. wateva font it is. i tried to change it but i dun think it worked lorh rofl. oh well... off to learn more.. ladeda...

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

hey. i dunno wat to say now. i always have lots to say when im not at the comp and so i try to store it in my lousy head and of cuz it neva works =P heh. anw had founders day today. pretty cool. sr nathan wuz vip. i think hes so unsmiley. dun like him. he seems quite forced leh. dunno la. anw i thot the concert wuz really good.. but some of them didnt think so. i like the collabrated efforts.. and i always feel so proud of rgs when theres like special occasions, cuz its like then when we see that our school is so talented and all =) so proud! haha anw i wuz getting so mad at assembly the day before cuz the teacher wuz telling us all how to behave like sing school song with gusto and wat not... and behave as tho we're proud of rgs... etc etc. i got mad.. cuz u see.. this is like brainwashing??? cuz see why pretend to be proud of ur school when u are? im sure most if not all rgs girls are proud of their school. theyre just too pragmatic and cynical to admit it sometimes. and like they're suddenly so on abt being proud rgs students and confident cuz of sr nathan. shitty logic. hrmph. and then penguin talked so slowly again and took up 10 mins. asking silly questions. but she DID make a good point. abt how we shld not just be prideful rgs students for founders day but everyday... ahh that wuz pretty good. anw she used up the time so taiwan ppt couldnt be presented. oh well.

im really proud of the exhibition anyhow. so much effort into it. esp fang. she did so much! and all soooo nice! and cheryl drew a really nice pic. heh. doing the exhibition brought back such nostalgia. hehhehee. oh well i'll blog later when i have something more to say =)

'in ur darkest hour, look up and u'll see theres always a star with u' =)

Here I am again. Surprising to find me considering i always leave my blog in the lurch. Anyway this time as usual i have lots of things to say.

First. Today wuz long day and like u kno wat? for the first time in like how many yearrrrs already that i actually thought soccer wuz fun! and i wuznt so scared anymore. Its pretty fun when not everyone is rushing at u madly and just whacks ur leg. Its also fun when there arent really people who get mad and petty about lil things. Its also fun when u win! ROFL! Yeah anw we only played one game but we got 1-0. I thot my team held up really betta than i thot so. Janice and elsie were cool defenders, eve the goalie and atiqah with me attackers/midfielders. quite cool eh. hehe. so not bad actually enjoyed pe today. and guess wat!! didnt have to run 12 rounds! MUAHAHHA. only THREE! everyone wuz soo happy haha.

next came chinese. got chinese test back. wahhh so disappointed. my zong he tian kong wuz so lousy! :'( and like made stupid mistakes here and there. christine got 80 marks. cool huh? big improvement. but u kno wat. at the end of that lesson me and heidi were like feeling so disappointed. cuz a fren, had a wrong answer that got marked right, and i pointed it out cuz i wuz wondering whys mine wrong when its the same as hers. so teacher pointed out that many of us made that mistake. so hmm okay. then me and heidi decided to let her fess up herself cuz we didnt wanna seem petty abt marks or wateva. and she didnt. left me feeling so upset dunno why. it wuznt abt the points at all. its like a measly 2 marks. but like... the principle of the matter. sigh. she just acted as if she didnt kno wat wuz happening. bleh. u might think blah leave the poor girl alone, its only a chinese test and 2 marks??! no biggie! but think of it this other way. if she cant even be honest and right abt this measly two marks and only a chinese test, what if things with a bigger stake comes into play in the future... sigh.

and now i shall tell the whole world that my financial health is soooo unhealthy. sigh. spend spend spend. keep eating into my own money. late fee. throwers shirt. this and that and that and those. sigh. sometimes wished my parents werent so like kiam in a way. sometimes they are sometimes they're not. bleh.
oh i have this totally UNHEALTHY addiction to food! its like me and faith and heidi and kim agreed at diff times that food wuz like this thing that makes u feel so happy when ure eating it. -wistful happy sigh- =) thank u food! ure my power, my pleasure, my drug! rofl.

Oh yeah. on dl right. i went mad. i got SO BORED all thanks to the lousy unproductive mines which didnt wanna yield ANYTHING at all not even ores for SIX rooms! thats mad. so i got mad and asked silv if i could do smth, cuz like he always says i dun do anything. he and nikkosh. grr. can make my day lousy and make ME feel so lousy. so then he said the horrifying word -RECRUIT! and guess wat i did? RECRUIT! -faints- 6 new members thanks to me. -smirks- then he sounded amazed at first then after that told me to take a break cuz we gotta teach these ppl first. blah and said other stuff too. bleh. Yeah so i recruited like rontar, patrick, wynter, kheled, bradhadair and Yverialle. mbbe hoken and lyris might join. doubt so tho. anw yah so i even brought tanii into the guild cuz i didnt wanna like dump them there promising help and not keeping to that promise. and since i dun log vicki all that often, i dumped tanii in. first thing silv asks is 'how long are u gonna stay?' and HEY here i wuz for the first time in a long time since i grew cynical on the game, that i actually help newbies more now and he says that. marvellous. so i said fine i'll just stay until they're okay and blah. asshole. i kno ii'll leave one day cuz i dun work well under him. i end up being so defensive and feeling lousy abt myself all the time. n we argue. bleh. like nikkosh. pigs. so im staying hargor. just like i did with tanii also in goa. blah. lousy shit.

Okay CHANGE CHANGE. no more depressing stuff! you kno wat, i wanna learn jazz guitar. i didnt even kno there wuz such a thing until my dad said so a few days ago. he wuz saying that some of the great guitarists learned from jazz guitars first, then progressed to where they were and their music tend to be betta. so being the young influential teenager out to set her own views, i agreed and got wowed. so now i wanna learn it. but i wuznt so sure that i wanted to learn it until i heard that blind guy at orchard using the electric to play this piece that wuz so nice! and sounded like jazz so i assumed its...? Jazz Guitar! omg. so nice. sigh. I WILL LEARN! WILL! MUST!